Jay Porks Podcast Episode #156: #NeverMyPresident

#NeverMyPresident is the latest edition of the Jay Porks Podcast. Take a Listen by clicking on the player below.

• Marches for Women happened all around the world to show solidarity against fascism
• The New Administration Wants to gut the National Endowment of the Arts
• WhiteHouse.Gov Has Deleted Any Reference to LGBT Rights, Civil Rights and Climate Change

Jay Porks Podcast Episode #155 'President Piss Play'

John Lewis stands to the left of Martin Luther King Jr. as President Kennedy meets with leaders of the March on Washington at the White House on August 28, 1963. (Photo by MPI/Getty Images)

The media was not allowed to view the "contracts" Drumpf has allegedly signed giving up his business interests (to his immediate family). Legal experts claim the page margins indicate that these were stacks of blank pages.  

The January Edition of the Jay Porks Podcast Spotify Playlist Jamfest. 

Oh Well, Whatever... "Newermind"

Allow me to reintroduce myself, my name is Jay Porks; and I'm pissed off. I'm pissed off at the mediocrity people will settle for these days. In times where you walk around to people humming Adele and trying to explain to me how much Lady Gaga is contributing to the canon of 'great' music. In a land where if Rick Ruben decides not to produce your record no one cares; Spin Magazine released a FREE download of a Nevermind Tribute album titled "Newermind", featuring ranging artists covering all the songs off Nirvana's major label debut. I've been waiting for this thing to come out for months-safe to say when Consequence of Sound announced last night that it was available at midnight and I didn't have to wait til Tuesday morning I was beyond stoked. Even though the only two acts on this record I have heard of are The Meat Puppets and the Vaselines, I felt there was nothing that can derail my late Monday Night-Tuesday morning joyous listening.

Until I read the reviews.

It was then I realized that it's true..people don't want good stuff. People want crap. They want Foo Fighters, they want Electric 6, they want Justin Beiber. Hell, if Kayne West took a take on Territorial Pissings, I bet this album would have been certified as the greatest thing invented since fat women discovered Diet Coke. But it seems that this eclectic group of artists covering these great songs just wasn't good enough for the "online music community".

Let's start with Antiquiet, a website I frequent often for music news, usually looking for the articles by Reverend Justito. Today there was a post on Antiquiet today that just made me want to cry inside. A quote: “Spin Magazine released a shitty compilation of Nirvana covers today entitled Newermind, to celebrate the 20th birthday of Nevermind. Wait, did I say shitty? I meant mostly shitty. There’s a cover of Stay Away by Charles Bradley & The Menahan Street Band that totally kills ”

Kills? Yea they kill it alright-this song would be cool if the Black Keys did it, not some Howlin' Wolf wanna-be. I get it, it sounds like its a James Brown song.. You like that garbage? I don't own any James Brown albums, and out of all the oddness that occurs on “Newermind”, this is one of the three songs I couldn't make it through Just because we live in an era of really crap music doesn't mean we can take anything crap that has a slight difference to it and call it revolutionary.. To say this is the stand out on this record is absolute lunacy. If this was any other website writing this I'd have an open letter out saying the 'F' word repeatedly, but like I said I frequent Antiquiet often-So I'm just going to have to agree to disagree with their views on this and pretend in my head that they give a shit. In the meantime, this Charles Bradley non sense is being removed from my iPod..

Meat Puppets doing Smells Like Teen Spirit: In a rage I posted an abbreviated version of this next paragraph in a Meat Puppets message board... What angers me is the reaction. It's as if people are expecting more from this song(or this whole record really), as if the Meat Puppets wanted to recreate it or something. From how it sounds like they came out recording this song, the band didn't even have this in their tour itinerary. They were asked if they wanted to do a song, showed a list of the songs left, and busted it out. I can bet they didn't think of things like “Okay, how are we going to do this?” That's not the way the Meat Puppets operate from what I've learned about the band over the years. They had an extra 3 minutes, they recorded a song.. I doubt Spin magazine came with Butch Vig and a $12,000/day studio to record this. What it sounds like is exactly how I personally expected it to sound when I heard it was coming out ..Do you hear that backing guitar noise progresses throughout the song into the solo? That's so Meat Puppets of them to do-I thought it was pretty amazing.. I cannot comprehend how this can go unliked. That said I cannot wait to get to the Gorge on July 30^th so I can find the Meat Puppets and ask about this whole process.. It's mind boggling to me.

No one says, wants or is hoping this is equal or better than Nirvana versions of theses songs-it's a celebration of an awesome album with contributions from some epic acts. Honestly, was a little disappointed with one of my favorite bands the Vaselines turning “Lithium” into a horror movie soundtrack, but I can still get on board with it after a while. JEFF The Brotherhood leaves us with a memorable “Something In the Way”, Titus Andronicus serves “Breed” some well deserved justice. Butch Walker and the Black Widows girling up “In Bloom” I can even tolerate without having to call the release “shitty”. Hell, I even found Jessica Lea Mayfield doing “Lounge Act”(one of my favs from the original release of this album) had me rocking out once you get past the initial sadness she has to inflict on you in the beginning of every song she's ever sang. And am I suppose to call her EMA? Anyway, “Endless, Nameless” doesn't beat around the bush, even on “Newermind”...

This will be the last point I make before I duck out of here, and it' a short one.. How much did you pay for it? Oh, right.. it was a free download. Enjoy it. And SPIN Magazine don't worry, I'll be back in two years for "On Utero" or whatever you're going to call that one-and I hope we can get the Meat Puppets doing "Radio Friendly Unit Shifter". Just a thought.

Late.

Dear Gavon Laessig, FUCK YOU!!!

Dear Gavon,

Balls... they are something you have. Talent, promise, pride, a penis.. these are some of the many things you don't have.

Let me fill all the readers in on the travesty that occurred over this past two days. I, Jay Porks of Concert Confessions and of course the Jay Porks Experience, headed out to the Terminal 5 in New York City to see an awesome band Dinosaur Jr, and opening acts OFF! and Fucked Up did little to disappoint on this evening as well. Henry Rollins is on the bill, and he is there to interview Dinosaur Jr at 9:30PM before they started their set playing 'Bug' in it's entirety along with some other gems sprinkled along the way. The interview lasted 18 minutes, and here it is:

See. Great job by me. My parents are proud, friends diggin' it.. everything is going more than swell..

THEN WE HAVE GAVON. Gaven is a tool who 'posts' for a website 'Buzzfeed.com'.. Get this friends, this guy actually ripped MY video from YouTube and used a 1 minute and 33 second clip of it to post on his own account page and this schlock shit website Buzzfeed.com. Normally, I wouldn't mind the extra pub, like when BrooklynVegan.Com uses my videos in their posts. Only difference with this douchebag GAVON is, there is ZERO mention of the name Jay Porks, I received ZERO credit for providing this asshole with a video that now has over 4,000 views while my FULL interview sits at 300. Let me tell you something GAVON: I got up at 9AM that morning to open up the restaurant I work at. I worked that shit job all day, then I got off at 4PM. I had Dinosaur Jr tickets in my pocket and my night was set to be one of the most epic ones I've had in recent memory. I was on the roof of Terminal 5 at 6:30 waiting for staff to let us in.. Then after avoiding people swimming down the steps to grab spots like they're going out of style, I picked mine out and perched myself there until almost midnight, documenting all the footage I can so the review I write of the show(not for a paid job mind you, but simply because of the PASSION I have in this shit) could be perfect-and it was. And all my videos of Dinosaur Jr had great sound, even my video of the interview I came home and wrote my piece up, and officially shut the computer off at 6AM to take a nap and wake up to check out the greatness I blessed the Internet with. Then you, GAVON, had the balls to come and shit in my fucking cereal. You have got to be kidding me. What work did you put into this exactly? You did a fucking google search! It's people like you, the slime and scum of the internet that are slowing down this whole web based journalism movement the rest of the media world is moving towards in the last decade. I stopped writing angry, ranting blogs a long time ago.. well congratulations dick face, you welcomed me back. You are a no class hack with a crappy life and an agenda, and that agenda being to produce material that sucks complete balls. To quote a legend "was your daddy jacking off and mom sat on it?" I mean seriously is that how you came to existence? You're the worst kind of troll I've ever run across in my YEARS of trolling message boards and debating with strangers. There's a better future in a YouTube comment thread than whatever it is you have on your resume. You have no idea what you've gotten yourself into. Because let's face it, the direction for me is no where but up, and for you it's the opposite. You see, people like me and all my buddies at Concert Confessions, we're people who "get it".. and the one's who get it, the ones who truly understand what in fact is going on with this new wave of journalism; these people will be around for a long long time. But parasites like you GAVON, hacks like you aren't gonna last very long once they realize that a fucking monkey can do your job. I obviously wouldn't be pissed if a monkey did this because I doubt they have the social conscience to understand internet etiquette(and monkeys are funny in general). Once monkeys or that cat who can eat with chop sticks take your job, you'll be reading my stuff online thinking "I should've listened to Jay Porks" in between your google searches for odd porn because your broke and living in some crappy apartment alone hitting your sack in your robe all day. You're the type of person I envision collecting welfare in the next decade. Look up "Lowlife" in the dictionary and see a picture of your face with synonyms "fraud" and "Complete Loser" listed. You are a sleaze ball. I don't get what's so hard with writing in the fucking video notes that "Video shot by Jay Porks". Because you say you got it from Brooklyn Vegan? When you play the video they embed in their site it's a direct link to MY video on MY YouTube page. That's called being credited. You, like the coward waste of life you are, took my video and illegally took it off YouTube with some program and passed it off as your own. Did you check out the rest of my Dinosaur Jr videos? Maybe there's some more pieces of a legendary night that I HAD which you'd like to STEAL from me. Asshole scum fuck. "Via Jay Porks" it's THREE FUCKING WORDS! three words could have made me your best friend, but instead you got this. I'm gonna look you up in a few years and cannot wait to see how much more of a failure you had become over this period. You single handedly destroyed what was to be one of the most classic weekends of my life, and all without even going to the fucking show. You, GAVON, are a true sucker of Satan's cock. Thanks for fucking my shit up, hope you had a jolly ol' fucking time.

With vile and hate,

Jay Porks

Writer: JayPorks.Com/ConcertConfessions.Com

All friends of the Jay Porks Experience, Concert Confessions, and anyone else out there in the online music journalism world who knows a thing or two about etiquette, I ask one favor of you.. the video below is the clip that this douche bag stole from my video..Go to the video on YouTube and click THUMBS DOWN on it.. even leave a nasty comment if you want.. Just please thumbs that shit DOWN and thumbs up any comments that support this movement of people who have common sense. This douche ruined my weekend